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| The Great Sex (Or Lack Of) Debate
By: Sam |
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| Sex is a vital part of any non-platonic relationship. Or at least it should be. Women agree it is. Men live by that code. Sex is a way that couples communicate with each other and so it should be happening quite frequently. Right? So what exactly is the reality of it? Frequent passionate sex is not exactly the reality in many (or is it most?) relationships. Again that leads me to ask the question "why"? This is especially true for couples who have been together for a donkey's age and have a couple of kids. They don't seem to have the time, energy or inclination to make sex a priority in their relationship. Even couples who are not living together, but just having "sleep overs" sometimes fall victim to what used to be frequent, boot knocking sex to having it dwindle to seldom and routine. What do you feel like when your partner tells you they are too tired or when they do have sex with you they rush through it? To me red flags should be coming up everywhere. It doesn't necessarily mean the death of your relationship but it could signal the beginning of the end. Because wasn't it the great (written dripping with sarcasm) Sigmund Freud who said that men's foremost goal is to have sex as often as they possibly can? While this might be overstating it a bit, I can tell you with some authority (being a guy myself) that if a guy is repeatedly (don't jump off a building if he refuses once in a while) not interested in sex there is something fishy going on. You will probably have to dig for it, ladies, but trust me, it's there. Here are some of the things that you might have to consider: 1) He's gay: Just because a guy isn't having sex with you doesn't mean he's gay. Most likely if he enjoyed at one time having sex with you he isn't but if you snoop around his computer and find gay porn then...maybe. 2) He's cheating: If he is getting sex somewhere else and you are second (or nineteenth as in Tiger Wood's wife's case) then he might not have the energy to do the horizontal mambo with you. 3) He might truly not be in the mood: Unlike popular opinion there are men out there who have to be in the mood to have sex. So if your guy is feeling unappreciated or tired or fat then it won't be happening between you two. | |||||||||||||||||
